I hate being the bad guy.

... Yet another brave warrior has been taken down by Ewing's Sarcoma. Once again, I feel terrible to say that I was a little late in receiving this news.

It's starting to get a little old, this whole cancer thing. And losing friends to it.

She was smiling up until the end. Even in her final posts, she seems to be doing well and was happy.

I guess we always want people to think we're "fine." We have to put on that brave face, even when we are scared to death.

There are few people that I was honest with about my treatments and such. Recently I discovered that I even made a habit out of lying to myself about my illness and treatments. You just want to be strong for everyone.

I am so thankful to have the health resources that I have. I have an amazing doctor, great nurses, the best medical technology available. Unfortunately, many are not as lucky as I am.

As of today, I am four months off chemo. I guess I completed chemo the same day Sharon died... She had just started a new chemotherapy drug. I don't really know what happened, but it saddens me nonetheless. She was so strong. Rest in peace, Sharon.


I had an MRI today. I have a CT scan next week. I'm hoping for clear scans. I've been feeling really good the past few months, but there's always that fear that the disease will return. I really hope that I am done with it. I am so fed up with all of this cancer stuff. I hate cancer so much.

I will try to start writing here again. I've been a bit busy lately. I haven't been feeling well enough to be busy in a very long time, so it's kind of nice. I'm doing a lot more and feeling much better these days. I hope these days will continue.

I'm nervous about the scans and what is to come, but I am very hopeful. I will be fine. I am always fine, I suppose.

Hope you all have a good weekend.

what were you wearing during your last kiss?

I don't know. Probably jeans and a t-shirt.

when will you see your last ex?

I have no idea

would you ever quit a bad habit for someone?

I would probably try. It depends.

do you miss anyone?

I don't know. Not really at the moment

if you had to choose: liquor or beer?

Dr. Pepper! But if I had to choose, probably liquor. Or wine. Beer's not my thing

who did you last text?

My dad

are you a patient person?

I think so. Usually ha

can a boy and girl be friends without having feelings for each other?

Yes

think a lot before you fall asleep?

Oh, yes. I take medication to make my brain "shut off" at night. It's bad.

last time you danced?

Today!

is there a person of the opposite gender on your mind?

Dad. He just texted me

what does your last text say?

Haha! "I took tomorrow off"

anyone you hate?

Nope

do you toss & turn for hours at night or fall right to sleep?

Sometimes, yes

are you on a desktop or laptop?

I am on my pretty flower laptop

do you like anyone?

I like a lot of people. Not really "like like", though.

do your parents know everything about you?

Yeah, pretty much

have you ever just felt like you could cry an ocean?

Yes.

warm, cold, or content?

Cold, I'm usually cold.

if you could go back in time and change things, would you?

I'm not sure going back in time would change anything, so no.

Does the number 420 have any meaning to you?

No

Do you like the band Slightly Stoopid?

Never heard of 'em

What do you think of animals?

Love animals!

Due to your feelings of animals, are you a vegetarian?

No, but I probably could be if I tried

 Do you like Trix cereal?

Aw, I haven't had Trix in ages...

Do you use Pandora to find new music?

Yes, once in awhile

Do you bite your nails, why?

No because I have no desire to

Wuld u take my surveyzz if i typ3d l1k3 d1$$?

No.

What is the worst thing a guy has done to you?

Emotionally abandoned me.

Do you like women vocalists?

Um, sure?

Lets say you had a baby with the last person you kissed?

That would be a bad decision on our part.

What’s the greatest thing that happened today?

I don't know. Got to sleep in a little bit.

Do you find smoking unattractive?

No. I don't.

You have to get a tattoo, where and what do you get?

A small butterfly on my hip!

Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?

Yes, I plan on it

Ever been told "it’s not you, it's me"?

I don't think so...

Do you want to be single?

Um. Pass. I'm not sure.

Have you ever dated the same person more than twice?

No

Do you consider yourself lucky?

Extremely. I am extremely lucky.

Do you ever think about stuff and start crying?

Yes

Do you have bangs?

Hahaha. Naw. I don't need hair!

Is this summer gonna be a good one?

I don't know. It may be a lonely one. But it'll be fine.

Have you ever passed out from drinking?

No lol. Not even close.

Are you mean?

I can be, but I don't think I'm a mean person

How many people do you trust?

Fully trust? Ten. Not too bad!

Have you ever dated someone longer than a year?

Yep

Do you get mad easily?

Naw

Do you still talk to the last person you kissed?

Yeah

Could you handle a long distance relationship?

That seems to be all I can get. I can handle them, but it'd be nice to be with someone I could see on a regular basis.

Is there anyone who doesn't like you?

I don't know. I'm sure there are.

Where is the person you miss the most right now?

N/A

Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

On the cheek!

Did you have an exciting last weekend?

Yeah! I saw Spamalot!

The last song you heard?

"I Just Called to Say I Love You"

Sensitive or tough guys?

I like sensitive guys.

Has a friend ever stabbed you in the back?

I don't think so...? I've been pretty lucky friend-wise. Not a lot of drama.

Your parents split; would you want to live with your Mom or Dad?

I don't know. Probably would stay with Mom if I was having health issues. I'd probably move elsewhere if I was healthy and able. I'd rather not think about this.

Seven days from now will you be in a relationship?

No, lol

Have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?

Probably, once upon a long time ago.